So here we are. Two weeks removed from Summerslam and one week past crowning a new Champion on Raw. I suppose you all have been wondering, “man, is that good looking married guy ever going to post again about wrestling?!” Well fear not, my fellow Nincompoops, my son is asleep, wrestling isn’t on right now, and I’ve drank some brewski’s so let’s go on and waste each others time!
What is going on in the world of WWE?!? Let’s rewind real fast back to the important stuff that happened at Summerslam. Sheamus beat Cesaro in the first of seven matches in a pretty okay match. It was shoved on to the preshow which was not how I wanted to start off my Summerslam festivities one bit. Charlotte became a two time champion in a sloppy match, which is quickly becoming a common thing with Charlotte matches, it’s not her fault, she’s just 29 feet tall so timing is off on everything. She has had some gems though, don’t get me wrong.
A.J. Styles and John Cena put on yet another Match Of The Year candidate. A.J. Styles has yet to have a bad match since coming to the WWE, which is why he is going the way he is. I’d say that the sky is the limit for him but this fucker is going to the stars. John Cena once again proved why he is called “Big Match John”. Love him or hate him, he has proved time and time again that you have to respect him. This was not only a wrestling fan’s match but it was a story tellers match also, with John Cena leaving his “Never Give Up” arm band in the ring. WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN!!
Before I go any further, I need to express my utter confusion with who ever it is that plans out PPVs. I’ll still include my summary but let me just throw this out there. In the last half of the show we had, Ambrose vs. Zigglar for the title, a cool down woman’s tag match, Rollins vs. Balor for the new title, Roman vs. Rusev, and the night capped off with Lesnar vs. Orton. Keep this all in mind, I’ll touch on it in a bit. Be patient. Cheezus.
Dean Ambrose and Dolph Zigglar told a hell of a story in the ring for the Heavyweight Championship, with Dolph once again coming up short, to no ones surprise I might add but it was a great match none-the-less. Balor ended up coming out as the new Universal Champion in a great PPV Debut match for Balor. I have some thoughts on this that I will throw in after I get done. Roman vs. Rusev didn’t happen. It took ten minutes away from the main event and pissed everyone off because it consisted of Roman attacking Rusev before the match even started and then beating the crap out of him so they called off the match.
In the main event though, holy smokes. That’s a good and a bad holy smokes. Brock got the TKO victory over Orton when he placed an amazing elbow right to Randy’s forehead and knocked him clean the fuck out. The was the best part of the match. The rest of the match was literally Brock hitting seven Suplexes, Orton hitting an RKO and then Lesnar elbowing the fuck out of Randy. This wasn’t advertised as a wrestling match so keep that in mind but as Orton’s PPV return, you really would have thought they would have given him a fighting chance. The ending made it seem like they got time cut and so they needed to just end it. It also seemed like it wasn’t supposed to happen, but it was. But damn dude.
So like I said, in the last hour and a half they shoved all of the big matches in there, leaving a non-title match to close the show. I can kind of understand that since it’s a high profile match and if it was any other time, everyone would have moved on from it, and having that cool down Woman’s match after the Heavyweight title match is basic form since it wasn’t the main main event. What I don’t understand is putting that Roman vs. Rusev match in between the Universal title match and the Main event. like I said, all it did was piss everyone off and you could tell it carried over.
On to Raw Daawwgg! No not really, that’s how babies are made and that’s a lot of work. So Finn is the first ever Universal champion right? Well, he had to give up the title, less then 24 hours after winning it because well, Seth Rollins has this stupid turnbuckle powerbomb that he uses and he let go of Balor a little early last night and ended up ruining his right shoulder on the landing and he needed surgery. This is also the same move that took Sting out of action for good. I have been part of many stupid idiot internet fights in the last few weeks about Rollins because of this. And Raw is going with it too, “Seth Rollins is dangerous in the ring! He’s reckless and hurts people! He shattered John Cena’s nose with a knee!” 1.Shut up. 2. The nose thing was an accident, anyone could do that. 3.Seth Rollins is an amazing wrestler who knows what he is doing…until it comes to that move. That move is reckless and dangerous, not Rollins. Sheamus has hurt more people and i’m pretty sure it was on purpose.
Anyways, so they made a tournament that Kevin Owens won this week, which was awesome. He deserves it. My second wife Bayley finally got called up from NXT and I wept like a little girl. Cesaro got “hurt” in the second match of seven against Sheamus which is ironic because I just got done saying Sheamus hurt more people then Rollins. It’s not a real injury though. It was a sick looking spot in the match, but they messed up when they showed the slow mo replay as many times as they did, because you could see that Cesaro never hit his back on the ring post like they said he did. Good story though, I’m just a nit picker.
As far as Smackdown goes, they have two tournaments happening for the new Woman’s title and the new Tag Team Titles. Smackdown is still a tag team show, which kinda sucks but it’s a bit more entertaining because it’s actual Tag Teams facing off and not Teddy Long’s conglomerations of sticking people together for a 6 man tag match. The Woman’s belt is bringing the best out of these girls who would be labeled as the B crew. They are stepping up and putting on some pretty okay matches but also making people pay attention to them. I’m looking at you, Carmella. No really…
The two shinning stars on Smackdown though? A.J. Styles and Dean Ambrose. A.J. earned himself a title match at the Backlash PPV and these two go together better then baby powder on my thighs. It will be super exciting to see what happens there, I would imagine that A.J. comes out of that match with the Title around his waist though.
That sums up everything that’s important in the last two weeks. I’ve tried to keep this shorter then my last few post, because I read on the interwebs that the average blog readers attention usually goes away after 1000 words. Tomorrow my beautiful wife and I will be heading to Raw at the Sprint Center. Look for us! We will have thenincompoopscoop.com sign! Thanks for letting me waste your time!